Pioneer Christian Monthly - January, 1994

New Beginnings - Family Resolutions
Kathleen Gerstner

"I'm going to lose to pounds." "I'm going to start an exercise program."I'm going to spend more time at home." going to look for a new job." "I'm going to study more.". . . The list of resolutions goes on. You probably have made and broken many of these resolutions, maybe even kept some of them! Making resolutions has been common at the New Year, a time of transition when traditionally people have reflected on the past and anticipated the future. It is a time for new beginnings.

As the new year gives us opportunities for new beginnings, it is important to look at our families with a fresh look and evaluate what is going well and what needs to be changed. If you are looking for a new year's resolution, try one of these for your family. Although there are many areas within the family, this article will reflect on your family's spiritual health. Are you regularly imparting scriptural teachings to your children? One of the clearest Biblical commands for this is found in Deuteronomy 6:5 which challenges us to "Impress [God's commands] on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them... on your hands. . . and foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your house." How often do you talk about God and his commands with your family? One of the best ways to do this is through daily family devotions. Does your family have a daily devotional and prayer time? I once heard an illustration which I think is very revealing. It happened one morning in Sunday School that a teacher asked her class if their parents read the Bible to them. One little boy piped up, "Oh yes teacher, my daddy reads the Bible every time we have company over." Are your family devotions like some people's house cleaning -- you do it only because company is coming? Resolve to have a daily family devotional time.

In addition, devotions should not only be reading a passage from scripture and a devotional followed by a quick prayer.

These are good things, but also your family needs time to discuss and digest or it will go in one ear and out the other. It should be a time to allow children to wrestle with Biblical concepts and God's expectations for them in their daily living. Don't assume that your children understand what it means to be saved, and use available opportunities to explain what it means to have Christ as your Lord and Saviour. You may need to start by asking questions of children to help them understand the point of the passage, or by allowing them to ask questions of parents or other family members about the meaning of the scripture reading. It is easy for this to turn into either a lecture or a quiz, but as your family gets accustomed to this format it will be a profitable time of discussion for both parents and children. And parents, don't worry if you don't have all the answers to questions your children may ask. The best thing is to say you don't know but will find out, and then follow through. You could ask your pastor for the answer, or even do some of your own research in a good commentary. Resolve to make your devotions a meaningful time in which parents and children together wrestle with and apply teachings in scripture to every day life.

In today's busy society it is not easy for a family to find time to sit together, even for a few minutes. This does not mean that a family should just give up and call it impossible. Rather, it means that families need to be more creative. Some families find that immediately following dinner is a good time, but in some families that is the busiest time. If so, maybe trying a time later in the evening before bed may be better. If you can't always get the whole family together, go ahead with who you have and maybe try a later time for those unavailable before. Resolve to set aside a specific time each day to gather together for family devotions.

If you have tried different ideas and still are too busy to get your family together for devotional times, you need to first ask yourself if this really is a priority for you. No matter how busy we are, we always seem to find the time to do things which are the most important to us. Where is God in your family's priorities? Another possibility is that if you are too busy for God, maybe you are too busy. Look at your activities and prioritize what is really important and what can be left out so that you have time for what is really essential in life. Resolve today to make God a priority with your family, and if necessary change your schedule to make this possible.

What about church services? When you go home do you discuss the sermon and worship service with your family? Any teacher will tell you that if a lesson is not reinforced, it is quickly forgotten. It is the job of parents, not teachers or pastors, to reinforce lessons which are taught at church. After leaving church, all too often the service is either ignored or "roast preacher" is served for lunch. Resolve to dedicate time each Sunday to discuss the worship service to stimulate spiritual growth in your family.

The spiritual condition of your family is something which should not be taken for granted, even if children are being brought up in the church. God has given parents the responsibility to teach children how to be saved, and how to live a life that is pleasing to Him. The church and other Christian institutions are there to help, but the responsibility starts and ends at home.

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